What's Wrong with the Big Ten: Cratered Expectations

(ed. note: something resembling real life has caused me to put this off for an extended period of time - this blog will be updated more consistently when it isn't the offseason, obviously)

...and moonlights as head coach of the Minnesota Golden Gophers football team

The third and final category of afflictions currently facing the eleven illustrious proud existing Big Ten programs is one that is difficult to alleviate and for which blame, if there is any, cannot be easily laid at any one individual's feet. Northwestern, Indiana, Minnesota, and Purdue - one prestigious world-class institution and three kinda-good state schools not unlike Ohio State- haven't been football factories since at least the '60s and will have difficult times becoming one in the near future. This I understand. Indiana is a basketball school, and thus, realistically, the football team will never take up much more than 20-30% of the average Indiana fan's attention, provided their roundball program stays good. Purdue is similar, and Minnesota may be heading that direction as well. Northwestern, on the other hand, has a knack for fielding annoying, scrappy teams in both revenue sports that will upset your sorry ass if you aren't paying attention. The problem with the programs I'm outlining is a general malaise within the programs; the fanbases are settling for less and getting it more often than not, but as we'll see, these programs are showing signs of being on the up-and-up already.

Minnesota is particular is interesting. I considered leaving them off this category after seeing them schedule a game against USC. Now, Minnesota is going to get drawn and quartered and then have their arms and legs individually drawn and quartered individually by USC in both games, but it showed me that the football program is looking to get exposure, and actually, shocker of shockers, get better with the ensuing recruiting buzz. Tim Brewster is probably not the greatest gameday coach. His teams exhibit extraordinary amounts of boneheadedness on both sides of the ball and, for all his excitement (and consumption of otherworldly amounts of cocaine and cocaine-related products), his antics have not produced the enthusiasm he probably wants from the fanbase (hence the lack of expectations). However, he's recruiting relatively well: Minnesota had the 59th ranked class in 2007, but shot up to 28th in 2008 according to Scout.com. 2009 is iffy at 45th, but if his teams start producing on the field, I have the slightest bit of confidence he can turn it around and field relatively competitive teams at some point in the near future. Right now, I can't advocate for his firing because his body of work is so relatively limited, and Glen Mason had gutted the program talent-wise at the end of his tenure. I recommend a new defensive coordinator, but they have one after Ted Roof bolted for Auburn.

Indiana is one of the schools I simply cannot fault for not fielding a competitive football team. It is the definition of a basketball school. Provided Tom Crean gets them back on track, this should not change unless the football team enters an era of sudden, shocking dominance. So what can they do to at least make bowl games consistently and give the Big Ten the impression of depth at even the basement level? It's safe to say Indiana talent is not anything anyone will be building a program on any time soon. They've already "gone spread", but they've basically been that way since the days of Antwaan Randle El. If Indiana really wants football to blow up for whatever reason, it has to get a more exciting head coach. Prior to writing this piece, I had to sit and think hard for nearly 45 seconds before I could name Terry Hoeppner's successor Bill Lynch. There is simply nothing remarkable about him. It's an odd criticism to have, but when you're Indiana, the guy selling "no bowl wins since the Gulf War in something called the Copper Bowl" is awfully important. The Googles tell me he's a nice guy. One particularly dark, lifeless, scary armpit of the internet emphatically believes he may be, but he's also a jackass who can't coach. Yeah, you read that guy right: he expects Indiana to win Big Ten championships. In like, football. While I don't think anyone outside of that guy sets their expectations above 8-4 and the Insight Bowl or some other bowl in a horrid southern backwater, I do think they'd like to see their team stay competitive on occasion with Ohio State, Michigan, Penn State et al. To me, the best way to build a struggling program is around a younger coach who can relate to his players. Bill Lynch, that is not.

Purdue next year will be the second Big Ten team this decade to go the "hand-picked successor" route. Danny Hope, cloned from one of Joe Tiller's tusks served as offensive line coach this past season after being brought up from Eastern Kentucky. Hope had a winning season all five years at Eastern Kentucky, setting up a good precedent for the program. Not a good sign, however: his first recruiting class: 64th, worse than such college football luminaries as Washington State, Duke and Baylor. This, of course, cannot all be laid at his feet and his first few years should see him being granted leniency over Tiller's turrible recruiting of late. I think it's safe to say that Purdue's offensive system has at the very least gone stale; if Hope wants to give defenses fits with a spread attack, he needs to recruit mobile quarterbacks and lightning dwarf skill position players, and he needs to go after the state of Florida like a pack of dogs on a one-legged cat. Literally every quick shifty little bastard not picked up by an SEC team, Ohio State, Michigan or USC, needs to be getting his ear talked off by Danny Hope.

Northwestern is a team and a program that really only needs a defensive identity. The offense has routinely been one of the hardest to stop in the Big Ten; even Ohio State and Michigan have had their troubles with the Purple Patricians, and this year's Alamo bowl appearance and promising shifty little bastard Mike Kafka probably starting next year, it's safe to say that this is a program mostly on the up-and-up, four straight dick-kickings by Ohio State aside. It's also safe to say that they probably will never be among the elite, lacking the prestige, the tradition, and the academic flexibility of most other big name programs. Nonetheless, Northwestern was a thorn in the side of Missouri and has a good chance of being more than that if it can just find some defense.

In sum, the Big Ten is not in good shape; this we all know. But amongst the true dregs of the conference - Minnesota, Northwestern, and even Purdue, there are small modica of hope, even if it's entirely in the future. At the top, the Big Ten needs tweaking. In the middle, it seems to be needing overhaul. At the bottom, it may be improving more than anyone realizes if the new coaching hires actually pan out the way the schools want them to do. This is, of course, conjecture; the Big Ten's future may exceed my wildest dreams and it may slip into (remain in?) the dregs of the BCS system with the Big Easts and ACCs of the college football world. But it doesn't have to be that way. Each of these programs can improve in some way. If you're a conference strength goomba, this is how the Big Ten gets better.

What's Wrong With the Big Ten: Dead Weight

Single-handedly destroying once-proud programs, one loss to a MAC team at a time

To some, this section may seem a little harsh. After all, the gentlemen pictured above are in the early stages of their coaching careers at their respective schools, one took his team to a Rose Bowl, and the other took his team to 12-win season in 2006. Both of them seem like relatively nice guys, in the same way everyone seems like a "nice person" when you hardly know them beyond a shared conversation or two. In all honesty, one is arguably a cokefiend and the other is arguably a meathead, possibly a hellspawn. I have no problem criticizing either of these two.

We begin first with Ron Zook of Illinois, more popularly known as [NAME REDACTED] to Blogfrica. His first season can be forgiven; he took over a team with really no talent to speak of left over from the Ron Turner era, and lead them to a 2-9 season. His second season is when Illinois boosters and the athletic department should have gotten a little wary of exactly what was going on in the wonderful little world that must exist in Ron Zook's head. He named Juice Williams his starter shortly into the season. This starter completed 39.6% of his passes on the season, looking like a freshman in every single game but being bailed out by yet another hapless Michigan State team under John L. Smith. There did not appear to be much hope for the future as the coach clung desperately to the promising-but-still-very-raw scrambler with a howitzer arm. Illinois actually improved on its loss total under the new scheduling rules, losing 10 games out of 12 and signaling what was thought to be an early doom for the Ron Zook era. To be honest, calls for his job at this point would have been very Ohio State - ridiculous and way too damn early. Yeah, it sucks, but you can muddle through. I tend to subscribe to the "three years and you're out" school of thought; if a coach takes over a failing program and doesn't lead them to at least a .500 season by his third year - and this "time limit", if you will, is negotiable, depending on circumstances such as the overall talent level when he arrives, expectations, etc. - he should probably be let go.

It can be said Zook responded quite well; the next season the Illini won 9 games, including a surprising win over top-ranked Ohio State. Well, I say this with tongue in cheek, because if you followed that team over the season, you knew it didn't look like a number one team and was only there because literally every team ahead of them at the start of the season had lost at one point or another. Ohio State was not that good, but it was still a respectable, potentially-program-building win for Zook, who rode his star quarterback all season long. Illinois went to a Rose Bowl and found itself in well over its head, but considering Williams was only a sophomore, things were looking bright.

It was not until his fourth year that the Zooker aura fully set in. Given the loss of some senior leadership on D (and undoubtedly the greatest patriot this country has ever known), a step down was expected, partially offset by the gains the offense - especially the passing game - was expected to make. Really, Illinois delivered on offensive expectations in terms of an improved passing game, but the running game was surprisingly lackluster; surprising because the talent was there, and so, arguably, was the offensive line. The passing game did improve drastically, but key elements of what made the Illini competitive in the Big Ten again - the rushing game and the defense - were simply gone. Illinois lost a defensive tackle, two linebackers, and both safeties, and utterly fell apart. That's a little more than half the defense returning; it should have taken a step back, but it should not have collapsed as it did in 2008. Were I an Illini fan, I would be extremely wary of this guy in 2008; if the team does not improve drastically with the influx of young talent, it has to be time to let Zook go. Florida fans would probably be the first tell you that this was not a good hire; the man has turned in one good season off the backs of unbelievable amounts of talent given Illinois' recent history. A younger, more - uh - rational coach - and some defense, jeez - would be a Godsend to the Big Ten and Illinois.

Wisconsin. Hoo boy. I have to say that I liked Barry Alvarez. A lot. Something about him made him more likable than your average coach. No idea why. When he left for Wisconsin's AD job, I was fully confident the guy would only approve a genius of a successor, one who wouldn't change what Barry left behind but also build on it. When he chose Bret Bielema, I figured the Bielema would do a heckuva job (Brownie) so and so forth and what not. I really didn't think much of it until he went 12-1 in his first season - on, admittedly, a schedule featuring various schools for the Blind and Infirm plus Michigan as the only vaguely good team - and Bielema looked like the Wisconsin Cheese Warrior God-King. I'll admit, this was my Scout/Rivals period, and I bought into the hype.

Then 2007 happened, and then 2008 happened. In both years, Wisconsin was expected to at least compete for the Big Ten title, and possibly find itself in a nice little BCS spot - probably the Rose Bowl - if it does just that. 2008 was a down year for Michigan, and 2007 was down for both Michigan and Penn State. This should not have been hard. In 2007, after a 5-0 start, Bielema met with his brother-in-failures Ron Zook, and lost. Wisconsin then lost four of the next eight, including a 31-point curbstomping at the hands of Penn State. Anthony Morelli was the starting QB for Penn State. ANTHONY "2-INTS A GAME" MORELLI. This is not that hard, Bielema.

I, and perhaps many Wisconsin fans, forgave Bielema for 2007. He's not perfect; while the conference may be down, this is a "young team" and all that. But 2008 was just bad. You goons lost to Michigan. Ten dickless paraplegics with an emu playing quarterback could have beaten Michigan this year. Actually, they did: Notre Dame beat Michigan 35-17; though to be blunt, Michigan would probably have won that game had the return team not been dipping their hands in butter and bacon grease on the sidelines. The heartbreaker to Ohio State is forgivable - by the end of the season it was obvious Ohio State was better than its 35-3 shitkicking at the hands of USC, and that it could, in fact, hang with 'elite programs'. A 20-17 loss to that team is entirely forgivable.

But, 48-7 to Penn State? At home, night game? That's fail with a capital "FUCKING HELL YOU INGRATE". Purdue held Penn State to 20 points, Ohio State held them to 13. Wisconsin's talent on defense is not that far removed from either of those two schools. Penn State, as I said before, during, and after the season, was not that good. Upon being smacked in the mouth, as pointed out in the post prior to this one, Penn State Big Tens itself into an oblivion of off tackle runs for three yards and wobbly underthrown desperation bombs. Wisconsin supplied all the butt Penn State wanted it to in that game, and it didn't have to be that way. This is Bielema at his worst; losing games Wisconsin, on talent alone, has every reason to be quite competitive in, and possibly win. Barry Alvarez would have won that game, I say this with no proof whatsoever but goddamn it, it violates laws of nature to lose that big at home if you aren't Just Northwestern, or Indiana. That's a loss the dregs of the conference look at and say, "damn, they just got their shit pushed up". Is it all Bielema's fault? It's never "all" anyone's fault (except when talking about Jim Bollman and the Ohio State "offense"); there are a number of factors including Wisconsin's terrible luck of the draw at quarterback, namely: they all suck some serious dong. Allan Evridge was unspeakably awful against almost everyone, and Dustin Sherer, while respectable until has late collapse in the Champs Sports Bowl, didn't really add anything to the offense.

I am not arguing that the aforementioned goons be fired because they aren't winning enough. If I were Barry Alvarez and whatever old white dude Illinois calls its AD, they'd be out the door based on a lack of results and the fact that they are not bringing anything new to the program, anything for recruits or the fanbases to get excited about. I call them dead weight because that's what they are; you don't have to get rid of dead weight. You can let it slow you down, and eventually drag you down. But you don't have to do anything about it if it violates your principles as an academic institution or whatever lamebrained excuse apologists trot out when it comes torch-and-pitchfork time.

The third and final section of this prolonged, needless rant deals with the cratered expectations of various teams - and of course, their fanbases - around the conferece.

Sittin' on top of the world, part 3

Part three of a three-part series of incoherent rants, jumbled musings and confused bullhockey about the last three seasons. Highlighted here is the Season of Upstarts and Broken Hearts, 2008.


So, it was 2008, I guess. We had a pretty good football team coming in, I guess. Number three in the country or something. I wasn't ready to get excited about much of anything, because regardless of how the season began and where we ranked in whatever preseason poll was being thrown out based entirely on program reputation, the fate of the entire season hinged on one game. In a down conference, after two years of embarassment, Ohio State had one shot to "redeem itself". As most of you probably already know, it did not. In the wake: "sputtering rage, gibbering condemnation and resigned ennui" as That Dirty Hippie Up North so eloquently put it. The one thing I actually cheered about all night was when Marcus Freeman finally got to Mark 'Dirté' Sanchez on a 4th down sack, when the game was already over, and the Humanitarian was running up the score to impress the voters. I don't have anything against Carroll or USC or running up the score; I just simply pumped my fist and let out a little, defeated "yeah!" from the comfort of my living room couch. Looking back at this, I realize now why exactly I was cheering a great play by a team down 32 points: it still had some measure of fight left in it. Say what you will about Heacock, Bollman, the Vest and their failures on the national stage and I will probably agree with 90% of it. But don't you ever knock this group of seniors for anything outside of the occasional blown assignment or missed block. Marcus Freeman, James Laurinaitis, Alex Boone, Malcolm Jenkins, and every other senior on that roster has invested anywhere from 4 to 6 years in the program, and every single one of them deserves our admiration, thanks, and utmost respect for representing the university most of you attended and nearly all of my readers (all three of you) cheer for. Marcus Freeman had been relegated to pass coverage and blitzing on only the most obvious downs all night, and even though it was hopeless and there was nothing but embarassment and shame and resigned ennuie to be had after this game, he still fought to the end as best he could. Like a fucking warrior-poet.

Ohio State again had a shot at redeeming this season if not the program as a whole in its night home game against Penn State. In a game I still can't entirely explain, the Ohio State defense held up against an offense that looked unstoppable against everyone save a fluky game against Purdue. Heacock, despite Penn State's athletic WRs and RBs and spread offense, did not chicken out and play soft. He played man on occasion, blitzed on unconventional downs, and the defensive line actually got pressure - plenty of it -on Daryl Clark. Penn State was held to its lowest scoring output of the season, and needed two freshman mistakes by the One to get out of Columbus alive. For the third time in 2008, Ohio State was held without an offensive touchdown. The best game Jim Heacock had coached since Texas in 2005 was ignored largely because of the failures of Jim Bollman's side of the ball. But that loss, and the other offensive woes, can not easily be laid entirely at the feet of Jim Bollman. After all, he's a glorified line coach. He's Mike Debord with a Buckstache. Tressel is the balla, shot-calla of the offense. He chooses the plays. Apparently, Bollman literally suggests three or four plays and Tressel just picks one. Not only is this somewhat disturbing, it's disheartening that Bollman is receiving criticism, much like Ohio State, over something he doesn't have as much control over as people would like to believe. The rest of Ohio State's season was so nondescript I can sum every game up in basically one sentence: Pryor attempts less than 15 passes, Beanie Wells solidifies his draft stock when playing, the running game muddles along okay without him, and the offensive line consistently gets owned by the 2-star and 3-star Jimmies and Joes of Northwestern and Ohio. Terrelle Pryor has been nothing but impressive. He has made his freshman mistakes - taking large, drive-killing sacks chief among them - but they have not come in the form of constant turnovers, or really anything that would make you even begin to think he might not be the long-term answer at QB. Other youngsters impressed, Dan Herron and Michael Brewster chief among them, and Jermale "the Jackhammer" Hines looked impressive filling in for Kurt Coleman when he could. It was by no means a youth movement, but it was encouraging to see the next iteration of Ohio State football taking shape in these younger players.

The season was a disappointment. I don't think anyone can argue around that. This was the most talented team Jim Tressel has coached. Outside of a tough road date at USC, it was reasonable to expect an undefeated season. We had a sixth year (!) senior at quarterback, three seniors on the offensive line, arguably the best cover corner in the country, and a top-5 linebacker corps. Typically, the expectations of the Ohio State fanbase are a bit much, to put it lightly. There are many in our fanbase who think it is our birthright to go undefeated every year and that anything less is simply unacceptable. Personally, I am under no illusions that Ohio State fans are "owed" anything, or that even while donating millions of dollars to the AD that they "deserve" something. There is a difference between expectations and demands. I expected an undefeated season, but I'm not opening up Lane Avenue Torch and Pitfork over a two-loss season.

Nonetheless - and this is something I think all CFB fans can agree on - Ohio State is developing a character, and this year did nothing but reinforce it. Come the big games against the supposed big boys, Ohio State crumples. It fails. It dies trying. Whatever happens, it defies simple explanation. Some attempt to take the easy route and blame Ohio State's "lack of athleticism" (Mark May, Colin Cowherd, Todd McShay) even while their colleagues continually place Ohio State players at or near the top of their NFL draft boards at basically every position. Others point to Ohio State's soft conference schedule, something over which the Buckeyes have no control. In 2007, people pointed to the lackluster OOC schedule, featuring two macrifices, a D-1AA team and a Washington game scheduled years ago, shortly after Washington won a Rose Bowl. Again, this isn't something Ohio State can easily control. Most of the Ohio State fanbase faults the two coordinators: Jim Bollman and Jim Heacock. These two are easy targets, given their staid, consistent-yet-underwhelming schemes and the general perception that Tressel is still one of the top-five coaches in America.

As usual, the truth lies somewhere in the middle of that clusterfuck. I buy arguments regarding Ohio State's conference being down because the counter-argument literally doesn't exist, I buy arguments about the two coordinators, and I can see why people think Ohio State lacks athletes, even though to do so, I must forget most of what I know about football, defensive and offensive schemes, gap assignments, reads, so on and so forth. The problem is not, and will probably never be a lack of athletes. There is no unifying cause of Ohio State's problems in the "big game", but I do think these problems will begin to be addressed by doing the following.

1. Give Heacock and Bollman a nice, long sabbatical/vacay in Naples, and bar them from entering the state of Ohio for any reason other than to visit family ever again.

2. Tressel must cede playcalling to Bollman's replacement. He will be compensated with a lifetime supply of Bonbons and a private Beach Boys (what's left of them) concert.

3. Hire Mike Barwis or one of the wolves who raised him as S+C coach. Steve Rehring, in both attitude and physical shape, is the embodiment of everything wrong with the Ohio State offensive line. In the offseason, he claimed he should be given time off from practice because he's been their for four years and knows what's going on. In 2007, he showed up to camp at a nice, lean 350 fucking pounds and lost his starting job as a result (which he would win back after dropping supposedly 30, maybe 10-15 lbs). The entire offensive line is resting on laurels it doesn't even have.

Sigh. I should probably wrap this up, shouldn't I?

The last three years have been interesting, to say the least, if you're an Ohio State fan. It all started with a monumental win at 2nd-ranked Texas in 2006, and three years later, it's come full circle to a rubber match with the Longhorns in the Fiesta Bowl. Many, including myself to some extent, won't give the Buckeyes a chance. 90% of the idiots who don't give Ohio State a chance will claim that Ohio State "can't win the Big Game", while simultaneously calling this a "rubber match" after Ohio State 24-7 triumph in 1 vs. 2 in Austin (seems like a somewhat big game) and Texas' 25-22 escape from Columbus in a game in which both teams were also ranked in the top ten. This era of Ohio State football isn't set in stone yet, despite all the negativity surrounding the program and its players. The coaching staff must put together one of the best gameplans they have in their time here, to send these seniors, ones that they have failed four consecutive times in the biggest games of their lives, off on a high note. If anyone is owed anything, it's these guys:

Sittin' on top of the world, part 2

Part two of a three-part series of incoherent rants, jumbled musings and confused bullhockey about the last three seasons. Highlighted here is the Season of Unfulfilled Promise, 2007.

So the fluke may have been just that, a fluke. We'd never lose a game that ugly under Tressel again, for reasons I can no longer scrounge from what remains of my seventeen year old self. It simply couldn't happen again, could it? We're the elite of the elite, a top 5 program, and nothing can slow us down, right?

Well, for the first eight games, 2007 seemed to return to the storybook sensibility that 2006 often portrayed up until the brutal, final end. Bruised and battered from humiliating defeat, a young team was rising to the occasion to redeem itself and the program for one massive, recent failure that shamed them (unfairly) in the eyes of the nation. Led by yet another in a long line of big, bruising Buckeye running backs, an affable, fifth-year (!) junior at quarterback and a downright sick defense, the men of the Scarlet and Gray were carving out a warpath to New Orleans, and they were hellbent on bringing back the crystal to its rightful home. That yarn culminated in a 37-17 prison rape of Penn State in Happy Valley. Todd Boeckman put Troy Smith's performance in '05 to even greater shame, Thunderous McTankly could not be stopped by the best run defense the Buckeyes would play all year, and the passing game finally showed signs of being a genuine threat, something other teams actually have to worry about. The defense gave up some yards to Penn State, but they "always ran on us", so it was forgivable, ya know?

Two weeks later, [Name Redacted] and the fighting [Redacted]i came into Columbus with two losses: to middling Michigan and Iowa teams. In quite possibly the strangest choice of defense in his entire time at Ohio State (outside the Florida game, of course), Heacock chose to run almost exclusively soft zone against Juice Williams, one of the most mistake-prone quarterbacks this side of Chris Leak. Blitzing only on obvious passing downs (a meme that will be reinforced later on), Juice was asked to make simple reads and simply run to the side they're not blitzing on when said reads were covered. Thus, we have the easiest 4 TD passing day Juice Williams has probably ever had. Maddeningly, Jokester Jim number two chose to blitz on seemingly every down on Illinois's final possession, and, enragingly (that's a word now), all Juice had to do was run where there wasn't a LB blitz. That's it. Ohio State gave him the easiest first downs of his life, and he took them without question. But to blame this game on Jokester Jim number two and Jokester Jim number two alone is unfair, and ignorant of a number of other factors I don't feel like listing because for me the grief is still too near oh fuck it here they are: Todd Boeckman threw three picks, three defensive breakdowns and one terrible fumble call by a corrupt ref and simply a better game from the Illini gave Illinois the win. It's as simple as that. Despite their thuggish actions after the game, I hold no grudges to Illinois for exploiting the second-dumbest defensive scheme I've seen.

Sigh.

So you can tell that loss still sticks with me. Losing to Ron Tiberius* Zook at home is something that should scar anyone for life, even if you're a Northwestern fan (my condolences).

*Not really his middle name, but should be

You know the rest of the season. Ohio State rode Thunderous McTankly to a 14-3 win at Michigan, Pandora's box was opened in the intervening weeks: War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, American Idol, and Ohio State finding its way back to the title game. Against an SEC team.

Hell, LSU looked beatable. Darren McFadden beat them By His Own Damn Self, and so did a meh Kentucky team. Surely we're better than Kentucky?

Turns out, not so much. After another fast start, the Buckeyes crumpled, and Tressel and Heacock went into their respect run-run-pass and soft-zone-obvious-blitz shells after LSU came back and left a big ol' mushroom print on Ohio State's hopes of actually winning. I don't know why they did it, I don't care to know why they did it, they did it, it sucked, life sucks, and we're never gonna fucking win a bowl game against these mulleted hicks and their fried food and their shitty T-birds and their shitty Kenny Chesney and fucking Christ next year better fucking redeem us.

I stopped thinking that way the next day. Well, at least the redemption part. I realized that as much as I love and support the players on this team, there is a chance that, like God Himself Bruce Springsteen once sang, their best will never be good enough. I knew it was a little early to declare this special group of players; Malcolm Jenkins, James Laurinaitis, Alex Boone, and the rest to be - for lack of a better term - cursed. To this day I still don't think they are, because since then I've realized the fault does not lie entirely with the players and the multiple first-day draft picks on both sides of the ball. The problem is increasingly coming from the top, and no matter how much talent is being brought in, this problem can not be covered by recruiting the daylights out of the "speed states" and grabbing three of the best offensive tackles in the latest recruiting class.

This is already too long, but as a footnote, you may have noticed a distinct lack of funny in this piece. This season was unbelievably frustrating because it showed what this team can be at its highest point (Penn State) and the very lowest (Illinois, LSU), and the timespan between those highs and lows was short and jarring. Thus, the humor, what little their was, didn't come easy.

I want to point out that I have never felt a sense of entitlement for this program. I have never believed that since I spend so much money on Ohio State merchandise and because my father donated something like 1/10th of his company's worth to the University, that the program, or the players, owe me a damn thing. Even when I was young and (less) stupid, this concept never entered my mind. I owe far more to this program for great memories of great football than it does for my meager contributions. When I call for the heads of certain coaches in the final installment of this series, it will not be because I "demand" it or I find the current (very good) state of Ohio State football "unacceptable". Think of them more as business recommendations, or how the program can improve its standing by trimming the fat, literally and figuratively. There is a particular path we don't want to go down, and that is the path of Michigan and Florida State - one of cronyism, nepotism, arrogance, misplaced trust and blind faith that because we are good we will always be good and nothing will ever change forever and ever amen lalalalalalalala I can't hear you we're the elite of the elite no matter what happens lalalalalala.

You get the point. I hope.

Sittin' on top of the world, part 1

The first in a three part series about - you guessed it - the last three years of Ohio State football

November 18, 2006. If you're an Ohio State fan and that date does not resonate with you in some way, you are dead to me, and the rest of the fan base. Number one versus number two, two evenly matched, excellent teams trading body blows for four quarters and the good guys emerging victorious. I was sitting there, Section 10B, row 13, seat 35, both arms raised in the air in a show of absolute joy - all my doubts, fears, and questions about the team erased with this one seemingly final triumph - as Antonio Pittman took the ball left for a first down, defiantly raising his muscular arm into the air and extending his index finger into the crisp autumn Columbus air. Only one more game to go and then we can officially call this the golden era of Ohio State football.

I was also there, couch, middle of my living room, Worthington, Ohio on January 8th, 2007, when the courage of men failed. When we forsook our friends and broke all bonds of fellowship. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of men came crashing down.

Alright, it wasn't that bad. But nonetheless, the dream season came to an end with both the deadening bang of 41-14 and the whimper of David Patterson crying on the sidelines. 22 angry alligators swallowed up the Book of Dreams before the last page could be written. I bear Florida no grudges - they took advantage of our weaknesses and played to their strengths. Despite what people say about them, the Gator fans who lived in Columbus showed a lot of class with their win, even when the final score essentially demanded a heavy round of razzing for their Ohio State fan friends. I can't say I wouldn't have talked occasional shit to them had the score been reversed, though I know I would have done it facetiously.

The ensuing offseason was an odd one. 41-14 was the 4114lb gorilla in the room, taking a giant dump all over great memories from the win at Texas and Buckageddon and flinging monstrous flecks of shit at optimism for the upcoming season, which looked to be a year of heavy rebuilding before the big one in 2008.

But there was an undeniable seed planted. Whatever worked against a down Big Ten and a rebuilding Texas didn't work - like, at all - against a Florida team that struggled to put away basically everyone it played. Florida walked into Tempe and beat #1 Ohio State, with Troy, Teddy Ballgame, Gonzo, Little Animal, MJ, Alex Boone, and Beanie freaking Wells by as much as it had beaten Southern Miss (Dr. S, if you're reading this, I mean no offense). While many fans were willing to call the game a fluke, blaming it on Troy Smith and his tasty cheeseburgers, and the offensive line and their tasty baconchocolatecakecoronoarystravaganzas, and the general fact that most of the time no one gives a team a change in a game, said chance-less team comes out and after four quarters, all of the favored's team base are belong to them. Personally, I didn't know what to think. My Scout and Rivals-addled 17 year old brain called it was "a fluke", insisting that 9 times out of ten Ohio State would win that game. This is what Scout does to you, people. That is your brain on Scout. I stopped reading and contributing consistently to Scout the day after the championship game. I couldn't bring myself to stop reading and posting altogether until sometime in the next season, unfortunately.

2006 ended in disappointment. 2007 didn't have much promise, being a rebuilding year with seemingly tough games at Penn State and Michigan. If there was any time to be fatalistic about the team if not the program, this was probably it. I missed the boat. I didn't think the team would be great, but I didn't think the program was dead either. Just another 10-2 season and a BCS game, no?